I know that that is what you expect. My mom often has the same expectation but the process of holding her hand is emotionally draining. Plus, if you have your own mental issues, and we all do to some extent, you become very vulnerable next to a BPD person. To do what you describe, while ideal, it’s very difficult in practice, I’m afraid. Unless you are very strong as an individual or disconnected emotionally from the person. For example, I could work with you with this need but not with my mom.

Makes sense?

Love,

Eva